Truth Hurts
by rebelgal298
Summary: What Happens when Sirius finds out about Ray's past? Can he ever forgive her, or is their relationship over for good? Complete! RR!
1. All Is Fair In Love and War

Truth Hurts

Disclaimer: As you know, JK owns all, except Ray (whom I own) and Lexie (who Icerelief2004 owns).

A/N: This is my first story so bear with me, please. R/R!

Chapter 1- All is Fair in Love and War

"What were you thinking?" Ray yelled at Sirius as she walked up to him. He started to stand up but she pushed him back down, but Sirius wasn't one to shut up easily.

"You're just mad because, for once, you were the one who was dumped. You can't stand the fact that somebody might not want to be with you!" Sirius stood up again and pushed her hand away before she got the chance to push him back down.

"How dare you!" Ray looked flustered for a moment but quickly recovered. "I love you and didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want us to get in a fight and break up. My past, your past, it doesn't matter! All that matters is our present and our future together."

"I have told you everything and never hid anything from you."

"Oh yeah? What about Laura? I never knew about her. Wasn't she your…what was it…your fiancé!"

"This isn't about me. This is about you and not being honest. And it's not like I kept anything else from you either."

"How am I supposed to believe that? We dated for three years before I found out that you were already engaged to another woman! But you know what? I don't care about that! I don't care about any of the girls that you were with. You know why? Because it doesn't matter to me. I couldn't even care less if you've slept with other girls before!"

"So you're telling me that I could go out tonight, get drunk, sleep with a bunch of girls and you wouldn't care?"

"If that is your plan, then fine. As long as you never, and I mean NEVER cheat on me. Because I couldn't take that. And I could never be the 'other woman' either. So if you want to go out and party, be my guest. Just do it before we get back together."

"And what makes you think we'll get back together?" Sirius asked, his voice as cold as ice.

"This." Ray wrapped her arms around him before he could object and kissed him. She didn't have to wait long before he kissed her back. He suddenly remembered that he was mad at her and pushed her away.

"No. Not this time, Ray." Sirius shook his head as he repeated, "Not this time." He turned and went upstairs. Ray just stood there, like she was oblivious to everything that had happened. Like she had blacked out and it wasn't real. She finally felt James walk up next to her and pull her down on a chair. Her vision was blurry and she tried to focus even though it seemed impossible. She refused to cry. She wouldn't cry. She wouldn't let herself feel the pain of her broken heart. She closed her eyes and the memories of Lucius hitting her when things didn't go his way came into her mind. She remembered lying to James, Sirius and Remus about where the bruises came from and them not really believing her. She squeezed her eyes tighter as she thought of the day her and Sirius first met. It was at James's house when they were six. That was the day that Lexie and her made a pact that they would always be friends no matter what. And they had always kept that promise. She remembered when Sirius first kissed her. James had dared them in their second year but it went on a lot longer than he had thought. It was because of James they were together. Because he had told each of them the 'character' to look for at the Halloween Ball in their 2nd year, and come to find out, he had set them up with the other. And their first actual date happened when he asked her to the Valentine Dance. But it wasn't until their Christmas in 5th year that she really knew they were destined for each other. She knew that day that she loved him and that that was enough. Her eyes fluttered opened as she looked around the room. Sirius was running back down the stairs to go to the library (shocking, I know). She immediately stood up as her friends looked at her quizzically. She stepped in front of him and wouldn't let him pass.

"Sirius Black, I love you and I promised you that I was yours forever and no one else's. I love you and if you can't see that, then you must be blind. I can't think of anything else but you even when we're mad at each other. It took me till now to realize I didn't need anything but you. And I really hope that you've already figured out that all you need is me so that I won't have to wait for you any longer. I refuse to wait for you because I know we have a future together. I don't care about anything right now except you and me. Does it really matter that in my past I've dated other guys? So what? I'm not interested in them. They were not the ones that I kept coming back to, but I never failed to come back to you. I didn't love him like I love you. And I know he didn't love me like you loved me. I know that it's impossible for anyone to know how I feel because I don't think anyone has as strong of a love for anyone as I do for you. I can't go on without you. I've tried it before and I couldn't breathe without feeling pain and misery. I've taken the easy way out and gone to a rebound-guy. I've been hurt physically, mentally, and emotionally just because I thought maybe I could do something without thinking of you. But I couldn't and I know I never will." Tears started to well up in her eyes but she still refused to cry.

"So here I am. Take it or leave it. If you think that you will ever want me then say so now, but if you walk away and walk out of here like it doesn't matter, there is no hope for us because I will not put myself through that again. I will not purposely set myself up just to be hurt again. And you may not know it, but I feel as bad right now as I did when I went out with Lucius. You never hurt me physically, but the emotional pain I have suffered seems so much worse. And I refuse to put myself in that position again. So right now. It's your decision. You can come back to me or you can walk away." Ray waited as Sirius just stood there as he replayed all the words in his head. No one in the room seemed to breathe as they watched what Sirius did.

"Ray, I-"

"No. Don't say anything. Just please do what I ask. Please. If you never listen to another thing I say, please just do this for me." He stood there again for another moment as everyone watched him. He shook his head and headed for the Portrait hole.

"I'm sorry." He muttered as he turned back around away from her.


	2. Send Me the Bill

Disclaimer: Obviously, I do not own Harry Potter, JK does. So, with that out of the way...let the story continue! 

A/N: Okay, so the next few chapters, including this one, are flashbacks. Sirius is thinking back about his time with Ray. Yes, this one is really short, but I think it gets the point across. Oh, and sorry for the mild use of profanity. Once again, please R/R!  
Also, many, many thanks to the people who reviewed: TheInfamousMarauders, Japanime1, and Maraudersgirl17! Y'all are great!

Chapter 2: Send Me the Bill

"I'm starving!" Sirius exclaimed as the seven Gryffindors headed down to the Great Hall for supper.

"Yeah, with all that 'hard work,' you must have worked up some appetite." Ray responded sarcastically.

"Hard work? Sirius? Umm..." Lexie questioned.

"Are you sure we're talking about the same Sirius?" came James's reply as he walked hand-in-hand with Lily.

"Well, I did know one Sirius that, excuse the play on words, was serious about his work, but I think he was blonde...and hot."

"What?" James stopped abruptly.

"Oh, did I say that out loud?"

"Score is now Girls: 1, Boys: Zip!" Lexie smiled as the girls burst out laughing.

"Can we go eat now?" Peter piped up from the back.

"Wait. Sirius, what exactly _are_ you hungry for?" James asked as Sirius grinned in such a way that made Ray blush furiously.

"Well, I know what I'm hungry for." came the cold voice of Lucius Malfoy.

"What do you want Malfoy." Sirius asked, returning the stone-cold glare that he was getting from the Slytherin.

"I think you know exactly what I want, Black." he said, eyeing Ray.

Ray, seeing where the conversation was about to go, quickly interrupted before anyone else could do anything. "Malfoy, just leave." She said, turning on him and watched as he didn't even flinch. She then turned to the Gryffindors surrounding her. "Go on down to the Great Hall, I'll be there in a minute." She ushered everyone ahead of her and watched as they grudgingly walked down the hall until the only people left were she, Lucius and Sirius. "Sirius, you too." Ray said, trying to pull hi, in the direction of the others.

"I'm not leaving you here with _him_." Sirius stated. Ray whiled him around so that they were face to face.

"Go." Her eyes pleaded with him, begging him to go, promising that she'd be okay. Unwillingly, he gave in, bent down and kissed her cheek, and sulked off down the hall.

After Ray assumed that Sirius was completely out of earshot, she turned towards Lucius. "Why do you always have to ruin everyone's lives? Especially mine? Why can't you just stay away from us!"

"And let someone else screw my bitch? Not happening." He smirked for a second until he felt a searing pain coming from his right cheek. He didn't even realize it was of Ray's doing until he saw the look of satisfaction on her face.

"You'll pay for that!" He spat at her.

"Send me the bill." Lucius grabbed her by the arms and slammed her, hard, into the wall. He pulled her away from the wall, towards him, as she struggled and slammed her back, relentlessly into the wall, again. "Don't worry, I'll get my payment soon enough."


	3. Secrets Revealed

Disclaimer: Once again, Harry Potter is not mine. Although, Ray is mine and Lexie belongs to icerelief2004.

A/N: This chapter is still a flashback. And sorry it took so long. I'm in the middle of moving and all, so I hope y'all understand! As of right now, the reviews that I got before the change on the site are posted on my profile, in case anyone's wondering.Please R/R!

Chapter 3: Secrets Revealed

Sirius stood behind the wall, frozen in shock and anger as he watched Ray and Lucius. He knew she would be furious with him if she saw that he hadn't left and stayed behind, but he also couldn't just stand back and do absolutely nothing. As he was about to step forward and give Malfoy a piece of his mind, something Ray said made him stop.

"You're going to have to accept that I am NOT with you anymore and I was never, and I mean NEVER, your 'bitch!' And I won't let you rule my life anymore! I am NOT your property and I am NOT something that you can control!" She spat at Lucius. She thought that maybe, just maybe, her words had made an impact on him and that he would finally leave her alone, but she thought too soon. He smirked at her for a moment and then slammed her against the wall again, this time making sure her head made contact with the jagged stone. He let go of her and watched as she slid to the floor, trying to recover from the blow.

"See, that's where you're wrong." Lucius corrected her in a calm voice. You ARE my property and I can and WILL control your every thought and move, just like I used to do when we were together. Being with me was probably the best decision that you ever made too, come to think about it. Although, you did screw up when you chose that…_dog_ over me." He said, bending down until he was looking her square in the eye. She held his gaze for only a second before gathering all her strength and slapping him again.

"No, that's where you're wrong. Dating you was the _worst _mistake that I ever made. I couldn't be happier with Sirius. But that's something that you never cared about-my happiness. As long as you stayed satisfied, nothing else mattered." This time he grabbed her by the neck and she desperately tried to push him away, just so she could get air. Just when Ray became unable to fend him off any longer, due to the lack of oxygen, he quickly let go and tore off down the hall. Ray was slightly confused, but didn't worry as she welcomed the oxygen-rich air that was entering her lungs. She then heard the footsteps approaching, the ones that had saved her from a terrible fate. Not even a minute passed until she saw Professor McGonagall appear.

"Ms. Carrington!" The professor stopped short when she saw ray on the floor, leaning up against the wall. 'What happened? Is everything okay?" She asked, her voice filled with concern.

"Oh," Ray responded, thinking fast, "it was nothing, professor. I just became really light-headed for a moment, but I'm fine now."

"Are you sure? Do you need to go to the Hospital Wing?"

"Really Professor, I'm fine." She managed a small smile that seemed to satisfy McGonagall, for she turned and went down the hall. Ray sat there, against the wall, for a few more minutes, until the pain in her head was just a dull throb. She kept a look-out in both directions for a sign of someone coming towards her. She only hoped that Lucius didn't come back, because she didn't think she had the strength to fend him off anymore.

Sirius leaned against the wall he was hiding behind and sighed. He wanted to check on Ray just to make sure that she didn't have to take a trip to the Hospital Wing, but his anger refused to let him do so. Instead, he decided to roam the halls and clear his head before the big confrontation that was due to occur sometime in the near future. As he walked, he replayed the incident between Ray and Lucius over and over in his head. He just couldn't believe that Ray would keep this from him. He couldn't even believe that Ray would even _date_ Lucius. But she was always the one that kept going on and on about being honest with each other and not keeping secrets. It was just too much for him to take in all at one time. He wanted nothing more than to strangle Malfoy and kill him with his bare hands, which is nothing compared as what he and the rest of that Marauders would do to him, when they found out that he _abused_ her, too. But before he did anything, he had to get ray to confide in him. He decided that she deserved one more chance to come clean and tell him everything. If she didn't, there would definitely be some problems.

A/N: Once again, I'm sorry that this took so long to post. And I hope to have the next chapter up within the next couple days.


	4. Too Quiet for Love or Words

Disclaimer: I still do not own Harry Potter.

A/N: Once again, still a flashback – but don't worry the flashback is almost over.

Chapter 4 – Too Quiet for Love or Words

Ray walked slowly towards the Great Hall to join the others. She hoped that Sirius would understand why she made him leave. It wasn't like she was afraid to tell him; well, she was, but that wasn't the point. She just didn't want to ruin the image that Sirius had always had of her. She had always tried to come off as strong-willed and independent, but if he knew all the pain that Lucius had put her through, she didn't think he could ever look at her the same way. When she was around Lucius, she felt weak and helpless; an image that didn't suit her well at all. She kept walking aimlessly around the halls until she heard voices moving towards her. Almost immediately, she recognized them as James and Lexie.

As she turned, she was greeted by, not only them, but Remus, Lily, and Peter as well. Sirius was nowhere in sight.

"We were wondering where you went." James said.

'Where's Sirius?" was Ray's immediate reply.

"Well, hello to you too." Lexie muttered.

"Where is he?" Ray asked again, getting more worried by the minute.

"We haven't seen him since we left you." Peter replied.

"Ray, why is you neck red? Are you okay?" asked Lily, concern showing on her face.

"I'm fine." Ray snapped as she started to leave them.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Remus asked.

"To find my boyfriend!" She yelled as she stormed off.

Ray finally heard the foreboding footsteps of Sirius pacing around the halls.

"Sirius?" She stepped out from the shadows as he whirled around to face her.

"Ray." He tried to keep his voice calm, but it was becoming quite difficult. "Are you okay? I was worried about you." She smiled at him as she walked up and wrapped her arms around him. Instinctively, he returned the gesture and held her as she started to cry.

A few minutes later, Ray pulled away and wiped the tears from her face that she had been holding back for so long. It wasn't often that she cried, but when she did, Sirius knew something was definitely wrong.

"I think we need to talk," whispered Sirius as he led her up the stairs and into the frequently visited Room of Requirements. Sirius figured that the best way to get Ray to tell him was to keep pushing until she broke.

"What was going on back there?" asked Sirius, breaking the intense silence that had begun to fill the room. Ray looked down at her hands, at the door, back down at her hands, anywhere except directly at him. She wanted to tell him, but she was afraid of how he'd react. She wasn't ready to lose him. "Ray?" He said again, this time in no more than a whisper. Finally, she met his gaze, but only held it for just a second before looking away.

The room was so silent, yet it screamed at her. It screamed betrayal, betrayal for hiding everything, and betrayal for having every available moment to say something, and not even speak a word. Just sitting there with him made her feel guilty, like even if she told him now, he still might not forgive her. She had kept this secret for a long time. She had no idea where their relationship could go after that. She knew that from this point on, nothing would ever be the same. If she didn't tell him, he would know that she was hiding something and everyday would be a lie for her. If she did say something, he'd never see her in the same way, for he'd never forget how she betrayed him, and betrayed their trust, what they had always tried to base their relationship on. It was just so easy to forget everyone else when she was with Sirius, for she could look into his eyes and feel like the only one in the world, and she wasn't ready to lose that.

She gathered up all her courage, and lifted her head. The man that she loved more than anything in the world was staring at her with a look that seemed to glance right into her soul. It was at that precise moment that she realized he already knew. How he knew, she hadn't figured out yet, but that wasn't the point. The point was that he knew. And she still couldn't bring herself to say anything. The only sound that Ray seemed to hear was the sound of her love's heart as it broke.

"Sirius, I…I don't know what you want me to say." She mumbled, unable to look at him any longer.

"What about the truth? Ever thought of that?" he asked, his tone becoming harsh.

"You wouldn't understand!" She cried, stifling back tears.

"I cared about you." Was all that he could manage to say.

"Cared?" Ray questioned. "Cared? That's it!" She asked, her sadness turning into anger and frustration.

"No, that's not it. I thought, at one time, that I loved you. And that was _my_ mistake. But I know better now." He said. He stormed out before Ray could say anything else.

Ray stared at the door, waiting for him to come back and tell her that he was feeling just as miserable as she was. But he didn't. She didn't know how long she sat there, waiting for him. Finally, she stood up and headed to the door. She had to find him and explain, explain everything. She just hoped it wasn't too late.


	5. I'm Sorry

Disclaimer: I still remain only a fan of HP and not the owner.

A/N: Okay, the first part of this chapter is a flashback, so for this chapter only, the flashback will be in italics.

Chapter 5 – I'm Sorry

_Ray came upon an unused classroom and saw that the door was slightly ajar. She peeked in, and saw Sirius sitting on the top of a desk. Quietly, she closed the door and went and took a seat beside him. It was a few minutes before he realized that she was even there._

_"Ray, I don't want to talk about it."_

_"I didn't want to talk about it before, Sirius. But we have to talk some time. Whether or not we want to." _

_"Why?" was all that he asked. _

_"Why what?" Ray asked, mildly confused. "Why do we have to talk about it? Why did I do it? Why didn't I tell you? Why do I love you? Your question is a little vague." Sirius sat there, without saying a word. "Sirius, you're going to have to realize that we can't move on until we talk about this. Our relationship can-" Ray was cut off._

_"Relationship? What relationship?" Sirius asked, standing up. "No, we have no relationship. Not anymore."_

_"Sirius, what are you talking about? Isn't this just like any other argument we've gotten into before? What's the difference?"_

_"The difference is that this one holds a lot more meaning. Our relationship was based on trust and honesty. I admit, I had my secrets too. But I came clean!"_

_"No, Laura came clean for you. She had no problem telling me."_

_"What's the difference! Lucius came clean for you! And when will you realize that I don't care about Laura! But I used to care about you! At least Laura didn't keep secrets from me!" He yelled at her._

_"And I don't care about Lucius! But I STILL care about you!"_

_"Do you really? Do you really care, Raychel?" He asked, using her full name, making her flinch in the process. "Because I don't think you do. And I don't think you ever did."_

_"Then you don't know anything. I've always cared about you, Sirius, and I always will. Don't ever forget that. No matter what happens between us tonight or any other night, I will always care about you, and I will always love you."_

_"How can I believe that when you can't even confide in me? How do I really know that you care about me and that you love me? See, that's the thing: I don't know. Believe me, I am much better off without you because I'll never have to second-guess anything. So maybe Malfoy _was_ right. Maybe your biggest mistake was breaking up with him and getting together with me. Because now, you've ruined both of our lives." And with that, Sirius walked out on her for the second time that night. _

_Sirius walked down the hall, anger bubbling up inside of him. He was so mad, that he didn't even want to think about Ray, because it just made him even angrier. He found himself at the entrance of the Gryffindor Common Room, said the password and entered through the portrait hole. Sitting on the couches were his other friends. Each of them with different looks on their face; each of them trying to figure out what was going on. _

_James started to speak, but Sirius stopped him, "Don't ask." James immediately shut his mouth, knowing that it wasn't the time to mess with Sirius. Sirius plopped down in a chair, unable to do much of anything else. He only had a few minutes to go over everything before Ray burst into the Common Room. Everyone instantly turned towards her, waiting to see what was about to happen._

Sirius stood not more than two feet from the door, not more than two feet from his freedom. Freedom and absolute bliss. That was what was waiting for him on the other side of the portrait. Never again would he have to put himself through this or anything like it. He would be free to do as he pleased with no one to tell him otherwise. Even though this is what he told himself, he couldn't make himself walk any closer. _Just do it, man, _he thought to himself. _Just two more steps._ He could tell that all eyes were on him, watching him, judging him. The only sound was coming from Ray as she tried to hold back her tears. He shook his head and took a step closer to the door. He listened as a few of the people scattered around the Common Room gasped. He thought back to the first time that Ray had come in all bruised up and bloodied. She had made up some lame excuse and then shrugged it off as if it was nothing. He, of course, didn't believe her, nor did any of the others, but they accepted it because they all knew she wouldn't tell them anything else. He tried to focus and bring his mind back to the present. _Quit thinking about her and just go._ The voice inside his head told him. He ignored it as Ray's voice came into his mind. _"Sirius Black, I love you and I promised you that I was yours forever and no one else's." _ He desperately wanted to believe her, but the voice inside his head refused. _She doesn't love you. If she loved you, she would have told you and not kept you in the dark. Just one more step and you won't have to worry about it anymore._ Once again, Sirius tried to ignore the voice. Ray was becoming even more unsuccessful at holding back her tears, but still she tried. Sirius could hear her and he wanted to run to her and tell her not to worry and tell her that everything was going to be okay. He wanted to tell her that they would work it out and that he didn't mean anything he said. But he couldn't do that either. He knew that there was only one thing left for him to do and that was to keep moving…forward. As hard as it was, he knew that he didn't have any other choice. He wasn't doing this just for him. He was doing it for Ray too. She needed this almost as much as he did. Some peace and quiet would do her good and then maybe she would find that one special person who would accept her no matter what. _Exactly, so what are you still doing here? Get a move on, already! _The voice was practically screaming at him. But still, he ignored it. Sirius couldn't help but think of when she finally did find that person, because he knew that that person would be the luckiest man in the world, just for ending up with Ray. And he would make her happy, and he'd never let her stand there and cry in front of him without offering to share in her pain. It was at that moment that he realized what a fool he had been. After all the stupid stuff that he had done, this had to top it all off, and he was afraid that there was going to be no coming back from that. Even though he had come to this realization, his legs were still frozen, inches from the door. Part of him longed to just take a giant leap out the door, and yet part of him longed to never go out it again, as long as it meant that he could stay with Ray. He longed to be the one to take her away from her pain and offer her the chance for a new start, a new life that consisted of nothing but the two of them, forever. He decided that he had struggled with himself for long enough. He had to do something, instead of standing there looking like an idiot. He shifted in position and the whole room grew even quieter than before. The room was filled with an eerie silence that only spelled out doom. But he knew what he had to do even if he didn't agree with it. He knew that he couldn't think anymore and just had to take action. He wouldn't let his mind control his body. Whatever direction he went in, that was the choice he was going to have to live with. As he picked up his foot to take that last step forward, his mind got the better of him and he whirled around, facing the entire Common Room. He didn't wait any longer to go to Ray and he ran towards her, picked her up and spun her around. It took Ray a full minute to realize what had actually happened, and she wrapped her arms around his neck as he kept holding her. He pulled her back a little bit, just so he could see her face.

"I never got to finish my last sentence." He said, a somber look overtaking his handsome features. "I'm sorry." He repeated, just like he had said when he was about to leave, "I'm sorry that I made you wait for me." She smiled at him as he pulled her head back towards him and kissed her passionately. Immediately, she returned the kiss and the whole Common Room erupted in cheers.

THE END

A/N: Well, I do hope that everyone enjoyed this, and I'm so glad that I posted it because it is the first thing in a long, long time that I've finished, story-wise! And hopefully, not the last. (I guess, hopefully, but that all depends on the reviews…so please help me decide by reviewing to this story! It will be very much appreciated!)


End file.
